So what shall I give?
I’m humbled, honored, and surprised by the number of people who subscribed to this newsletter/blog/thing since I announced it on Monday—thank you! As I feared, this means I actually have to keep this MF going now, but I can do it and I will!
Initially, my plan was to share essays about topics related to sex, race, motherhood, and culture, which might on occasion invoke my own experiences, but would not center my life in any significant way. However, since I hit publish on the first post, I’ve felt the urge to talk to you guys about all of the things! I want to send you funny stuff I’ve seen online, and I want to share links to music and books that I think you may like, and to share anecdotes about my kid, etc., etc., etc.
I also have some personal things that I’d like to open up about but I think that I have shared a lot about myself with the internet over the past 12 years, that Black women’s publicly vulnerability typically serves everyone but the sister putting herself on the line, and that there are far more valuable things I have to offer aside from myself this time around. But, the impulse to share is still buzzing in my head.
I admire writers who are really good at strategizing around their own work. I’ve developed #content for publications and organizations that was intentional and well-planned, but I’ve yet to approach my own output in the same way. That’s not to say that I’ve never been strategic as it relates to my writing or My Internet Life; however, ‘strategy’ has never been at the heart of how I’ve conducted myself online. I can’t count the bags that may have cost me, but that’s probably a good thing.
Honestly, my entire career has been a mostly-happy and sometimes-terrible accident, not unlike the rest of my life thus far. At 36, I can confidently say that this is NOT, I repeat, not the best way to orchestrate one’s steps.
Or, maybe it is? I guess that remains to be seen. In college, I decided to major in Theatre without the thought that typically goes into that particular choice. I became a writer quite by accident. Most of my jobs have found me. I got pregnant on accident. A lot of life has seemingly just happened. Or, perhaps more accurately, while it may have appeared to casual observers that I’ve been the captain of my vessel, I may have been something akin to a pushy passenger.
Alas, I’ve spent the past year working on becoming a better version of myself; starting this weblog page was one step, and creating a long-term vision for it will be the next one. In the meantime, I will be throwing some stuff at the wall to see what sticks. The name and the frame might change. I promise to be consistent, with the goal of being intentional. That’s a good place to start, right?
More to come,
Jamilah.
It’s a great way to start. Keep going!